Friends

I had dinner with a friend last night who I hadn't seen in at least two years. We had a great time & ended up talking for 4 hours.
I was nervous about having dinner with her because of how we meant & I know my husband doesn't fully trust me. Will he ever trust me with friends?
I started thinking about the friends I have in my life & how I have nobody I can pour my heart out to. With D I didn't think twice about saying something to offend her or something too off color. We talked about how most women are caddy & back stabbers with friendships & why great friends are hard to come by. I wonder if men have this same problem?
I've always had more male friends then female. I'm ok with it. When I stopped drinking one of my closes friends ending up saying "You can a couple long island iced teas" Some friend huh?
I'm just babbling today... I have a lot on my mind... D said I must have a ping-pong ball or two bouncing around in there somewhere, I can't keep a train of thought to save my life. She listened to me talk about my marriage & said I really don't have a clue what I'm doing.. Finally someone gets it, I don't have a fucking clue! I don't have a grand plan. The only thing I want is peace, respect, trust & freedom.